*cc photographed by Alasdair Massle

I often find myself wondering what love really is.

What makes one person so attracted to another – to a point where one loses ability to focus on anything else?

Perhaps it is because I know not of a true love, and only rely on romances I’ve seen in movies or shows. Perhaps it is because I have yet to find someone that causes a change in my heart. Perhaps it is because I am a cold and bitter person, unable to love. Perhaps, just perhaps, I will never love.

I believe I have good reason for thinking this way. Others may think I’m crazy or heartless – maybe even fake – but I find myself wishing to be proved wrong even more as time passes. I love and care for my friends and family deeply, but – not like that.

I thought I had loved at one point. Maybe because it was a low point in my life. Maybe because he said the things I wanted to hear about myself. Maybe it was because I was lonely. But infatuation is completely different than love.

This so-called “love” always ends in heartbreak or pain anyways.



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